10.06.2010

Halloween: Rearranging junk and it's dirt.

Out comes the bleach cleaner, windex and feather duster.

Next comes the vacuum cleaner, dust pan and broom.

The glass is polished, the dust bunnies banished and cobwebs disappear.

Clean.

Clean some more.

What's a cat to think?

Is company coming?

Maybe Ed McMann to deliver the Publisher's Clearing House million dollar check?!?

None of the above?

Oh yes, how could I forget?  It's time for a little fall cleaning.  Especially for Halloween.

Clean?  For Halloween? Creepy, forelorn, haunting and dusty Halloween?????

"She" cleans before putting out the Halloween.  And I'm not referring to throw a sheet over the furniture. Does this cleaning thing sound logical to you?

What?!

You're kidding, right?

I see you are in need of some enlightenment.....Let's think about this together okay?  Although there are new Halloween decorations, "she" also likes to include those old beat up things "she" already has.  Most of which are probably held together with old glue and maybe a touch of dirt.


Or maybe more dirt than material substance.  

Having lived here these past years, I have decided that I've developed an immunity to every known dirt spore, dust monster virus, and  general old stuff allergen.  To live here, you would have to develop an immunity....or die trying.


Anyway, this old tattered stuff seems to be everywhere, no matter the season or decor.  Especially for Halloween decor.  "She" thinks it's purrfect.  And I'm smart enough to know better than to tell "her" otherwise.

Pitifully sad really.  

No, not pitiful in that old is what "she" prefers. (I've decided "she's" just weird that way.)  What I'm saying is pitiful because for days "she" cleans, straightens and rearranges vignettes.


Only to declare it complete when spider webs are added right back where they were recently erased from being. And the spiders themselves smashed with "her" broom or sucked up in the vacuum cleaner if they are on the porch.

And there are about thirty holes dug in the dirt with headstones sitting in them. Lots of dirt.  Lots of holes. I'm thinking purrhaps a gopher would be of great assistance next year. Or maybe I could dig some holes. Of course I'd even be considerate enough to leave a present or two in some of the holes ;) Betcha the gopher wouldn't be that nice.....


And complete/done includes dead crispy flowers as part of the decor for the dearly departed souls.

Natural elements such as tree branches and moss are purrfectly necessary too.  But when I try and assist, dragging in a lizard, "she" throws it back out the door. I assure you it would have looked better than that masked rubber rat!

Clean, straighten, rearrange.  So that faux-neglect of old, tattered, spooky and haunted can be added back in to create the purrfect Halloween setting of a neglected haunting decor.  

Wouldn't it make more sense to just use the existing dirt and cobwebs for some authenticity!?!?!??

Seems like an obsessive, compulsive disorder turned inside out.  Purrhaps?

Notes to self: 
  • Next year go ahead and proceed with natural fertilizer in the flower beds - "she" will thank you for the dead flowers later.
  • Collect about half a dozen lizards late summer. Timing is important so that when "she" finds them under the sofa they look mummified.  "She" will thank you for your contribution to the natural elements category later when the shock wears off.
  • Do not use the coffin as a litter box.  It leaves no doubt whatsoever as to the guilty party and results in being grounded for the month of October.
If you're read this far and have not been scared away by all this creepy old stuff, it would seem that you are up for some more adventures.  You are some kind of brave!

Please do stop by again later, so that I have company and someone to hold my paw during the really scary parts.  You see, I signed us up to participate in Vanessa's Halloween Party at the Fanciful Twist on October 16th!  Oh  yes, there's more to be seen......hang on to your whiskers! It's bound to be fun!

15 comments:

Jaime Haney aka ArtsyFartsy.Me said...

Hey Romeo! You can come hang out at my digs... I've got the real thing... cobwebs, dirt, dead flowers! and they are going no where. haha "she" reminds me of my mother... aka the bleach queen ;) (I wish I were more like them both!)

I'm loving the Spooky decor... looks fab!

Cat Nap Inn Primitives said...

Oh Romeo, your mamas got this halloween thing down to an art!! I love everything..but you know we are both alike..we clean as we decorate...and yes it is sad...but thats how we run..thanks for sharing and don't get caught in any webs;)

Lululiz said...

Oh Romeo, humans, eh? Especially female humans, who can figure them out?!?!?

Now remember, Romeo, street cred! You don't need anybody holding your paw ( you are ferocious after all ), you are offering your paw to help others through the scary bits, right?

Love your plan for the lizards, SHE is bound to love them, you are so clever.

Catherine said...

Oh my goodness ~ your family truly goes all out for Halloween! But I do think I would have left the dust until after Halloween. It wold have just added to the scariness. :)

Happy Thursday Romeo!
xo Catherine

Linda @ A La Carte said...

Romeo does she scare you with Halloween? Charlie does not like the scary stuff....

oldgreymare said...

Romeo,

Just join in the festivities and hide behind the couch until she is dropping off to sleep and then spring upon her with a loud kitty howl and say "Boo!"

..and then run and hide some more before she kicks your "boo-ty" out the front door. :D

xxx
Howie

DogsMom said...

How would "she" know positively it was you using the coffin litter box. I would blame the masked rat.
I posted about some impostor kitties and cobwebs on my blog today.
I'll come back to party with you on the 16th.

Rustique Gal said...

Oh, Romeo! I totally get what you are saying, but she has done a great job at faux creepiness. We don't want the real thingies!!
Happy October
Sherry

Lynn Richards said...

oh, my goodness!!! I thought cats loved to be clean??? oh well. I get headaches with bleach, so I try and stay away from it.
My favorite is the rat with the mask and the grey pumpkin! Where did you find a grey one?? So cool!!
xo
lynn

victorian parlor II said...

Romeo,

Good to see I'm not the only one putting up with this decorating nonsense. Unfortunately, my mom hasn't done much cleaning which means our cobwebs and dust bunnies are authentic. What's a cat to do? The only obvious thing is to play with the dust bunnies and chase the spiders from the cobwebs! I like to add a few tufts of fur for a little extra pizzazz:). My mom has been so busy with the ghost tour trainings and plantation tours that she hardly does anything anymore which means I have to do all of her blogging for this month. Unbelievable! She's almost as lazy as the dogs.

Purrs and Meows,

Kramer

Plumrose Lane said...

Oh Romeo, you always make me smile with your enlightened wisdom ~ it's those nine lives, isn't it?!
I like your game plan too, good to have long term goals. ;D
♥Sharon

Olive Cooper said...

Oh Romeo, the paradox of a clean house and Halloween! I took pics of real spider webs...big ones. olive♥

Vicki said...

Romeo - I thought cats liked to play with all the holiday decorations? Think of all the fun you'll have with all these great decorations every time she leaves the house?

LYNDY WARD said...

Great Halloween Decorations... Ed McMann passed away last year, so he would be a ghost & that would fit right in with your theme...

I'm not sure if this your Halloween Party Blog link, but it's fun anyway.

Please fly by for my giveaways too...
Hauntingly Yours, Lyndy

My Haunted Halloween Party Link:
http://bit.ly/dho880
TODAYSGOLD
http://todaysgold.blogspot.com/

Sophia said...

What a spooky party you have going on here! I'm off to the table for some of your special brew, mingle with your guests, and then back to my Manor to tend to my own guests.

Check out Harrington Manor Ball today.