Halloween: Rearranging junk and it's dirt.

Out comes the bleach cleaner, windex and feather duster.

Next comes the vacuum cleaner, dust pan and broom.

The glass is polished, the dust bunnies banished and cobwebs disappear.

Clean.

Clean some more.

What's a cat to think?

Is company coming?

Maybe Ed McMann to deliver the Publisher's Clearing House million dollar check?!?

None of the above?

Oh yes, how could I forget?  It's time for a little fall cleaning.  Especially for Halloween.

Clean?  For Halloween? Creepy, forelorn, haunting and dusty Halloween?????

"She" cleans before putting out the Halloween.  And I'm not referring to throw a sheet over the furniture. Does this cleaning thing sound logical to you?

What?!

You're kidding, right?

I see you are in need of some enlightenment.....Let's think about this together okay?  Although there are new Halloween decorations, "she" also likes to include those old beat up things "she" already has.  Most of which are probably held together with old glue and maybe a touch of dirt.

Or maybe more dirt than material substance.  

Having lived here these past years, I have decided that I've developed an immunity to every known dirt spore, dust monster virus, and  general old stuff allergen.  To live here, you would have to develop an immunity....or die trying.

Anyway, this old tattered stuff seems to be everywhere, no matter the season or decor.  Especially for Halloween decor.  "She" thinks it's purrfect.  And I'm smart enough to know better than to tell "her" otherwise.

Pitifully sad really.  

No, not pitiful in that old is what "she" prefers. (I've decided "she's" just weird that way.)  What I'm saying is pitiful because for days "she" cleans, straightens and rearranges vignettes.

Only to declare it complete when spider webs are added right back where they were recently erased from being. And the spiders themselves smashed with "her" broom or sucked up in the vacuum cleaner if they are on the porch.

And there are about thirty holes dug in the dirt with headstones sitting in them. Lots of dirt.  Lots of holes. I'm thinking purrhaps a gopher would be of great assistance next year. Or maybe I could dig some holes. Of course I'd even be considerate enough to leave a present or two in some of the holes ;) Betcha the gopher wouldn't be that nice.....

And complete/done includes dead crispy flowers as part of the decor for the dearly departed souls.

Natural elements such as tree branches and moss are purrfectly necessary too.  But when I try and assist, dragging in a lizard, "she" throws it back out the door. I assure you it would have looked better than that masked rubber rat!

Clean, straighten, rearrange.  So that faux-neglect of old, tattered, spooky and haunted can be added back in to create the purrfect Halloween setting of a neglected haunting decor.  

Wouldn't it make more sense to just use the existing dirt and cobwebs for some authenticity!?!?!??

Seems like an obsessive, compulsive disorder turned inside out.  Purrhaps?

Notes to self: 

• Next year go ahead and proceed with natural fertilizer in the flower beds - "she" will thank you for the dead flowers later.
• Collect about half a dozen lizards late summer. Timing is important so that when "she" finds them under the sofa they look mummified.  "She" will thank you for your contribution to the natural elements category later when the shock wears off.

• Do not use the coffin as a litter box.  It leaves no doubt whatsoever as to the guilty party and results in being grounded for the month of October.

If you're read this far and have not been scared away by all this creepy old stuff, it would seem that you are up for some more adventures.  You are some kind of brave!

Please do stop by again later, so that I have company and someone to hold my paw during the really scary parts.  You see, I signed us up to participate in Vanessa's Halloween Party at the Fanciful Twist on October 16th!  Oh  yes, there's more to be seen......hang on to your whiskers! It's bound to be fun!

Cats and dogs always know what time it is.

Always.

You’ve noticed that haven’t you?

Think about it.....We know when it’s dinner time, lunch time, fresh water in the bowl time and snack time.  Especially snack time. We even know when it’s time for you to come home from work or shopping.

Calendar time? That’s a different story.  Our life does not need a calendar, so we don’t need to keep up with the day of the week, the date or even the month. 

For the really important times of year, we just seem to instinctively know.  It doesn’t hurt that the Halloween decorations are out.  Or that the Christmas tree is waiting for us when we wake up from our mid-morning nap.  We’ve found these to be pretty good indicators of important holiday seasons. 

Consider too, seasonal times of year - AUTUMN! After all those hot temperatures this summer who isn’t wanting some crisp Fall temperatures?! 

However, there is a small problem here sometimes…..Autumn comes before any Halloween decorations up in the house.  So unless the leaves are already falling, the entrance of Autumn might be missed.  And the really good leaf falling days are simply not to be missed.  Some years seems like I miss them while I’m napping.  Yep, it goes by that quick.

So imagine my delight when Grammie gave “her” these beautiful Autumn napkins with an important note….

What’s this?!? First day of Autumn?!?! EeeEkkkK - Oh my whiskers!!

There is not a moment to wait! I MUST get outside so that I don’t miss one single moment!

“Too hot Romeo” or so “she” says.  Hmphh. Sounds like an excuse to me.  Didn’t “she” read the note?!?

“She” must be blind as a bat.  No wonder “she” loves Halloween.  A fitting holiday if you catch my meaning….

Well I was not to miss this important event.  I wanted to be outside so as to greet Autumn when it came through.  Afterall, who else was going to be able to convince Autumn and it's crisp temperatures to stay around for a bit.  It’s important to make Autumn feel welcome.  If you want her to stick around for a bit...

‘Excuse me,’ I politely asked, ‘may I go out for some fresh fall air?’

No reply.

Okay so “she” is blind AND deaf as a door nail?!?!

*pop* upside the large fluffy one’s angelic head.  Is “she” paying attention now?!?

Victim: Zoe - the large fluffy angelic one

NO?! You gotta be kidding.

*pop pop POP* MEWRRRROOWWW

Ah, so the deaf one does indeed hear....

‘Now may I go outside? Please’

Freedom obtained. But there are no leaves falling. Unless you count the dead ones that didn’t get enough water. (hint hint whoever could be at fault there)

Still I opted to stay outside. Grammie said it was the first day of Autumn.

So I would wait.  For Autumn. For hours.

Past my curfew time of 9:00 p.m.

It wasn’t that I didn’t know what time it is.  But you knew that already.  Unfortunately, so did “she”.

“She” came outside looking for me and called my name.  Over and over. 

Walked the property.  Still calling my name.  Mumbling too that it was past my curfew. Not that I was close enough to hear that.  I’m just saying.

Hey, “she” needed the exercise. And it was a pleasant evening.

But around 10:30 I decided it was probably time to call it a day and wait until tomorrow.  Besides it's hard to sleep when someone keeps yelling in the background of your cat dreams.  Maybe Autumn would stop by tomorrow.

And if Autumn had shown up, I would have been ready.

If “she” hadn’t thrown me in the dungeon grounded me.

Now it’s raining.  I think Autumn may be on it’s way.  The temperatures feel cooler.  Well as much as one can feel from down in the dungeon inside the house.  Looking out from the window. I sure hope I can escape so that a proper welcome can be accomplished.  I love fall and want it to last more than a week.  How about you?

If you like fall too, how about putting in a good word for me? Purrlease?  I really want to go play in the leaves…we could play in them together......I'll bring the snacks....purrlease......

Paper Love

Any idea why us cats like to lay on paper?

Me neither.

Oh, but I do love paper – all kinds, shapes and sizes!

This past Friday, “she” went to Atlanta.  And “she” stopped at one of my favorite places – Archivers.  Have you ever been to Archivers?

Me neither.

Not that it matters.  “She” brings home the most wonderful paper and I don’t even have to ask! How’s that for service?!?!

“She” told me how “she” fell in love with this paper.  You know that love at first sight thing?!

My Mind's Eye project example by Tamara Jensen

“She” loves the vintage look, the colors…..

And the GLITTER?!?!

Is this not the most wonderful paper?!

My Mind's Eye project example by Tamara Jensen

This is my mostest favorite paper ever!  As far as the new stuff goes.  The really old stuff is still the best but "she's" got it locked away in a trunk so I can't get to it....Anyway, when I lay on this paper, the glitter sticks to my fur! Yep! Ain’t this grand?!?

I’m hoping this brings the babes by the herds!  Can’t you see it??! Herds of admiring babe cats?!

You don't think the glitter and shine has attraction?!?  Have you not read the very popular Twilight Saga series?!  

For those of you who have not, the lead male character, Edward is a vampire.  Bella, who is human, describes Edward in the sunlight, ‘shining like thousands of diamonds’ (or something like that - "she" is not always so easy to share a book with).  So anyway…. if us guy cats get lots of glitter on us, we'll sparkle and shine like thousands of diamonds too !!!! 

With the popularity the Twilight series has, and us looking all sparkling like vampires....  How could we not have herds of cat babes swooning over us!!!

I'm thinking I should also remind you, we don't just have one life, we have NINE!!!  I think that may already qualify us as vampires of sort, don't you think?! I mean that would explain our charming purrsonality,  good looks and fangs, yes?! I think I'm on to something here...

What?

You don’t think the glitter and nine life thing has vampire validity written all over it?!?

Hey, did you forget about the fangs already?!?

Hmfph!

Is that your skepticism showing? Or just toilet paper stuck to your pant leg?

Better sleep with one eye open.

I’m just saying……

A Battle of Wills: Fabric Roses vs. "Her"

Grand-dad’s a pretty kewl guy!  He made “her” me a nice bench out of an old bed.  He’s an engineer and designs and makes things.  Really solid things that are so well built, they will most certainly be intact for all nine of my lives, give or take a couple hundred years.  

With the bench complete, the next step was to replace the upholstered headboard.  No problem, right?

Wrong.

Would you believe “she” waited six weeks before giving up on the local upholstery company?!?  Sure, there were phone calls and emails and multiple requests for quotes.  The quote needed was for the headboard and a couple of cushions.  Nothing fancy.  Just cover it with a solid color of something durable and neutral.  Heck, they probably could have covered it with a painter’s drop cloth and used the staple gun.  Certainly, nothing exotic or over the top.  

“She” tried to be patient.  I mean I really think “she” did good.  I can tell you that I sure wouldn’t have waited six weeks for a quote on an anchovy pizza with extra cheese. So I wasn’t too awfully surprised when “she” decided that six weeks and no answer was just no longer acceptable.  Gee, you think?!

So “she” took matters into “her” own paws.  And really, it was probably just as well.  Because while the original thought was something simple….throw some creativity into it and it takes on a life of it's own and becomes something else entirely.  At least "she" won't have to feed it or train it to use the litter box.

I wonder though….do any of you creative types do and then re-do something you are creating?!?  “She” thought “she” wanted lots of fabric roses.  I wasn’t impressed but as long as they were not on my cushions I wouldn’t say a word.

There must have been a bazillion of them.  "She" worked several nights on them.  Only stopping when "her" paws hurt.  When "she" reached the magic number of a bazillion, some were pinned on the headboard and “she” thought “she” liked them.  So "she" started gluing them on.  Then about halfway through the bazillion roses, “she” paused and wasn’t sure this was what “she” really wanted.  

"She" would sit and stare at them.  And I would nap.   

The more "she" looked the more certain "she" was that they were coming off.  The design was no good.

But the roses.  They had other plans.  And they were NOT cooperative.  Not even a little bit.

The glue had dried.  Hard as a rock. 

Pulling and twisting did nothing.  Well...except tear the net lace.

Scissors became necessary. 

Oops.  Scissors slipped a little.  Sure hope that can be covered up. Can fake suede be glued back together?

Sure you don’t want those roses on there?  Maybe just a few??!?

Many came off.  Unwillingly.  But they came off.

Some stayed.  Some didn't make it through the tear them off phase and they became fabric lumps.  And some were relocated to another configuration.  No, not the lumpy torn ones.  I got those. BTW, they slide very nicely along the wood floor.  I'll share them with you if you come over to play.

Then one evening something magical must have happened because “she” started working with specific direction.  And common sense – pin things BEFORE gluing and BE SURE you want what you see. 

Walk away from it.  Revisit and look to see if you still like the direction. Novel idea, yes? As you may be suspecting, naturally, I suggested this plan of attack.  

I think that because of my contribution and support as well as Grand-dad’s talent with wood, it turned out acceptable.  I’m still testing the cushions for comfort….I’ll let you know what I think…..after my nap…..

Anyone else want to volunteer to help me try out the new bench for comfort?????  The pay isn't good, but the benefits are pretty decent....milk and snacks will be served....